Thursday, March 31, 2005

Cost of Living

Too wealthy to be considered poor, yet too poor to own a home or afford health insurance.

What is this phenomenon? Middle class? Not according to the stats in this city. The "middle class" refers to those raking in great annual sums of $80K. Not too shabby if you ask me. What about those pulling in a meager $35K?

Well you can't buy a home with $35K a year. At least not here. So, what's a person to do when they can no longer afford to live where they work? Where do you go when you've poured everything you have into exhorbitant rental fees leaving no funding for an escape?

And health care--what about it? What is it with paying workers just enough to entice them with the idea of having health care, but not allowing them enough to actually afford it? Dangled carrots of hope, this offered insurance is, swinging before your eyes just to keep you interested. Something is wrong with having to pay hundreds of dollars a month to keep insurance for your family, only to be hit with a huge deductible you can no longer afford--because you've been paying hundreds of dollars a month to have insurance!

Is it my imagination, or is there something wrong with this picture?

I worry about people. One can't complain too much or they are labeled a whiner. Some say if you have financial problems it's up to you to fix them yourself. Of course, that's easy to say for one who has more than enough funds. What about regular people? Those whose pay has not kept up with rising costs, what of them? What happens when you are bombarded with medical expenses, auto repair expenses, housing expenses all at once and no resources to fall back on? How does one handle these issues alone?

Contrary to what some may believe, people don't enjoy receiving handouts. Most people want to make their own way. I just wonder who has set the standard that we are all to live by. Who decided to create such a division between the "haves" and "have nots"?

It is a fool who craves the power to have it all, over everyone else. The many dependents inherited by this rise to the top can topple the perspective at a moment's notice.

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Pitifully Puffy

Yep, that's me, pitiful. Pathetic. No choice but to blame it on the hormones. I know, I know, a cop-out. Nevertheless, tis true.

The husband and I have discovered the presence of a tiny being residing comfortably in my belly. A happy occasion, to be sure. What a surprise! My first child is nearing the age of 10 years, which is quite a spread. No doubt a miracle has happened! And when the queasies subside, I'm sure I'll be glowing beautifully and hopping with joy! Egad.

Of course, in my condition, I've become self-centered. This is not a normal state for me. Normally I'm right there doing everything for everyone else, having nearly forgotten my own needs. So now, you betchya, I'm taking advantage. Haha!

The problem:
Because my husband is not from this country and has not seen his family in nearly 10 years, he's planning a 2-week trip this summer to visit them. He'll be traveling sans enlarging-wifee and kiddo. And while I support his need to see his parents and siblings, I can't help but feel a tiny bit abandoned at this time. Unfair? I'm not sure.

In the meantime, my face will contort into a smile when he mentions going back home. I'll be happy for him. I'll try not to be envious of his huge family. Okay, I just won't tell him I'm envious. His excitement pokes at my heart and brings back the aching loss of my own family. I'll try not to cry... in front of him. But while he smiles, I'll be remembering the brother I lost and the father I lost. It can't be helped. Though, I will remember, too, that my mother waits to visit with me and the kiddo this summer. We'll certainly enjoy each other's company, and smiles and laughter will hug us with soft security.

So, pitifully puffy I will go and reconnect with my own hometown--wearing a sweet smile and keeping my mind open.